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So I'm sad,pissed, and frustrated all at the same time.... So about a month ago my parents kicked out my brother and he's 18 (I"m 20). So he's living with me at my house. Well Monday night I get a call at about 1:30 with a guy on the phone saying " Hello this is Officer Martinez I have a Nick....... here, we picked him up for driving under the influance can u come pick him up?" WTF!?!?! OMG?!?! HOW DID THIS HAPPEN??? I say no leave him there I will pick him up tomorrow.THey give me all the info I hang up and my head is just everywhere. So I pick him up the next day 275 bucks because of detox. Go get the car outta the Poice impound lot. That costed 140 bucks. Nick has never drinkin in frount of me or me home drunk or anything before so I'm just in shock over the whole thing. SO of course parents are mad and are upset with me and I have to be with him the the whole court stuff. I find out that I need to get a lawyer I guess for his court date. He blew a .23 the legal limit is .08. So does anyone know how this works or what I need to do or him? Any help is awesome. Thanks all

 
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Are you looking for legal advice? If so, this is the wrong place for that. I can move it if you want?? If you are looking for advice in general about his "problem"...I'll leave it.

 
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both would be cool thanks

 
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This is better suited for legal...I'll move it there.

 
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Well I dont see how the whole thing would make your parents mad at you unless they are mad cause you bailed him out.

But make his *** get a lawyer. He was the one drinking and driving, it isnt your responsibility to get a lawyer for him. If he doesnt have money, tell him to get a court appointed lawyer. And no you dont have to be with him at court, he is 18, he is an adult.

 
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Alot of states are putting new laws into effect that anyone under 21 caught with alcohol will loose their license till their 21st birthday, at the least,,, problem one. They may go easy on him, or might not but most likely he can kiss his license goodbye for a while. He may need to attend AA meetings and keep out of trouble for a year or so. Either way he is screwed. I know it's your brother but he is 18 and not a kid. You shoudn't get a lawyer for him and let him face the music and it will teach him a valuble lesson. He will tell the judge what happened and he deals with the outcome.

 
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That is the law around this way. A lawyer may be able to get him a better deal or even off, but that would likely not be a good thing for him. It is usually pretty hard to get a someone off on a DUI charge, but if you get a lawyer and threaten to take it to trial they will often plead it out to actual physical control or something similar.

 
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Yea.. the parents are mad at me because he was my responsibility and I should have watched him more closly. Still though he is 18 and he blew .21 I was told he would have his license taken away for a year max cause it was his first offence. He's car is gone and I'm selling it and since it was a new car he will be paying the difference. He's feeling like **** now which he should and I'm really not talking to him. I made him clean out the car and make it look beautiful the way it should be. It looked like hell on the inside and it was a brand new car. I'm just trying to figure out the process of it all. Btw thanks for moving it

 
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He is not your responsibility. He is 18 and responsible for himself. If anything your parents are resposible for him. No offense but your parents sound pretty messed up if they expect you to take care of your brother, especially after they kicked him out. Hopefully he learned his lesson, a DUI is not the end of the world, it will not haunt him for the rest of his life, like a felony conviction would.

 
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completly agree

 
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1. It is not your fault. You have already moved out at 20, so you are taking care of yourself. You are repsonsible for ONLY you and your children.

2. Your parents need to step up. It is their child. If they want to play tough love, then they cannot blame anyone for helping your brother in any way. And they cannot say it is your responsibility to do anything for him. They brought him into the world, not you.

3. Your brother needs to grow up NOW. His life is fast on its way to becoming over. A DUI is going to follow him forever. No license, record, maybe even a felony in your state. Money, car, all is going to be lost.

4. Your brother needs a lawyer. He is in serious trouble.

I am not trying to pass judgements, my brother is in prison right now, so I know exactly how you feel. You are in the middle of a terrible situation. You did the right thing letting him sober up in JAIL. That should have been a sombering situation. He needs to take responsibility for his own actions. He is 18 now and he has to pay for his mistakes.

Know that you did nothing to deserve this. You are out living your life and staying out of trouble, saving your money. It is not your duty to bail him out. Decide how much you are going to put out for him. He is living in your house, so he has to follow your rules or find a place of his own. You don't have to go to court with him, you didn't break the law. But that is your heart to decide how much you want to put out for him.

 
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Kick his *** out the End

 
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I completly agree as far as the parents end.. they kicked him out and then I was taken advantaged of. His car is mine and he's paying for it still, took out the the **** in his room and moved it into storage so now he sleeps on is a matress and his clothes are neatly folded on the floor. Dresser out, tv, nightstand, everything. He hasn't spoken to me in 3 days but thats fine and now parents are starting to get the pic but whatever I'm throwing my hands up

 
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he is a grown man now. He has to take responsibility for himself and if he does get into a legal bind then he should learn how to get out of it. If he loses his license then so be it...it was his decision to drink and drive and he must learn from that.

 
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look that kid knows what he's doing, don't beat yourself up over and certainly don't drop any more money on it, that's on him man, he's 18 if he doesn't have a job then he needs one because he's got some bills to pay.