Civic DX crushed EVO VIII! ;)
05-30-2005
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Civic DX crushed EVO VIII! ;)
lol...can't wait to see the replies on this one! some of you will understand 
This Sunday AM was nice. Cooler than I wished for, but sunny and bright out. I was headed to Home Depot, had to get some stuff for the house. I love heading out early in the morning on a nice quiet Sunday…wind in my hair, snarl of a high strung Honda motor in my ears…
I was on a barren, open stretch of 4 lane surface street. Separated by a median. A few well spaced lights, but not much cross traffic as it ran down the side of the local mall. I like running down here once in a while to let the Honda power plants breathe without getting on the freeway. Today was no different…the best part was, someone else had the same idea!
I saw it up ahead…a brand spanking new EVO VIII! Canary yellow….bad looking car! I pulled up next to him, glanced over…he looked at me, shaking his head in disdain…’I would school another today’ I thought to myself. I just smiled and nodded….
It was on…I dropped the car into “N”, revving the engine menacingly. Neutral? Hehehe…I had my trusty 92 civic sedan, DX trim….1.5 liter firebreathing monster under the bonnet! All 89 ponies made the car lurch up and down and I gunned it…blue smoke billowing from the 1.25 inch exhaust tip. I revved, let off the gas…listened as the loose muffler rattled against the rear bumper…oh yeah, this one was mine!
I had one hand on the steering wheel, on layed lazily on the shifter. I looked at my radio, pretending to ignore the light and the EVO…I was going to play with this guy! I glanced at the stop signal out of the corner of my eye, trying to make him think I wasn’t paying attention. I turned up the volume on my STATIC X cd, listening as the 2 way paper coned speakers buzzed and echoed hollowly through the car….it made my neck hair stand on end…or did the whine of the engine do it…who cared!
I saw the green light flash out of the corner of my eye. I dropped the mighty DX into “D” and hammered it! There was a split second delay as the tranny waited to kick in…BAM! I was off! I looked up…what the? Wow! I had dusted the EVO…where was he? Wait…he’s not behind? Oh ****!
I noticed the yellow dot on the horizon up ahead. ‘Muahahahaaha’….I thought to myself, my plan had worked. I made him ‘think’ he got the jump on me! I don’t think so grasshopper. I punched it harder…the floorboard creaked from the strain of my foot planting accelerator into it. The rubber pedal bent to my will. “come on!” I screamed…the DX finally shifted into 3rd……………there! BAM! Into second. I was off!
The 1.5 liter accelerated hard! A 3 legged chihuaha pulling a 50lb cement block came instantly to mind…I was catching him fast now!
I saw him brake lights…here’s where I would take my prey. As he waited up ahead for the light to turn green, I buried my foot further into it….all 89 ponies strained, screaming for mercy! I didn’t care dammit! I would win if it killed the motor! The speedo creaped skyward….37…………………………………….38……………………………….39……it was on! By the time I got to within 500 feet of the ‘blessed’ EVO, I was nearing the civic’s peak speed……57……..58……………………5…..9……yes! I had done it! I pushed this beast past it’s known limit!
I was on the EVO fast….just as I got next to him the light turned green.
Everything went into slow mo…I tuuurrrnnneeeddd mmmyyyy hhheeeaaaddd…toward him…our cars neck and neck. I glanced down at the tach…errr…hmmm…no tach…I looked at the speedometer: 61! Holy!! I had pushed the envelope. I pointed to him, slowly, then pointed to the door of my civic…tapping the sheetmetal just below the mirror…”after I beat you” I screamed above the din “I’ll go home and clean this spot of bird **** off my car!” ahahahahaha….this race WAS mine!
I looked down again, radio. I glanced up just as we cleared the intersection. I looked over…what the? Where was he now, had I passed him sooo fast I didn’t realize? Wait! There! That yellow dot again…it was him in the distance.
But then I saw it…and my chance. The flashing light….This would end now!
I pressed the pedal even harder…..whhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…no, the DX was not crying…or maybe it was? I didn’t care, “You will take me to victory” I howled!
I blasted down the road…inching closer every second! I saw his brakes again…then that flashing light…his turn signal? I was after him…I closed, then got next to him…wow! This thing was fast! The turn signal…the brake lights…it’s a mitsu! I’m sure it was just electrical problems.
I blew past the sorry bastard, flashing the famous “L” out the pass window. He turned into Target, or as I call it “TARJAY”, French for “cheap”. He most likely was trying to get off the road, utterly embarrassed, before he wrecked his precious EVO…he was blind with rage, I’m sure.
I smiled to myself…I had fooled this wily foe. And I had won!
This Sunday AM was nice. Cooler than I wished for, but sunny and bright out. I was headed to Home Depot, had to get some stuff for the house. I love heading out early in the morning on a nice quiet Sunday…wind in my hair, snarl of a high strung Honda motor in my ears…
I was on a barren, open stretch of 4 lane surface street. Separated by a median. A few well spaced lights, but not much cross traffic as it ran down the side of the local mall. I like running down here once in a while to let the Honda power plants breathe without getting on the freeway. Today was no different…the best part was, someone else had the same idea!
I saw it up ahead…a brand spanking new EVO VIII! Canary yellow….bad looking car! I pulled up next to him, glanced over…he looked at me, shaking his head in disdain…’I would school another today’ I thought to myself. I just smiled and nodded….
It was on…I dropped the car into “N”, revving the engine menacingly. Neutral? Hehehe…I had my trusty 92 civic sedan, DX trim….1.5 liter firebreathing monster under the bonnet! All 89 ponies made the car lurch up and down and I gunned it…blue smoke billowing from the 1.25 inch exhaust tip. I revved, let off the gas…listened as the loose muffler rattled against the rear bumper…oh yeah, this one was mine!
I had one hand on the steering wheel, on layed lazily on the shifter. I looked at my radio, pretending to ignore the light and the EVO…I was going to play with this guy! I glanced at the stop signal out of the corner of my eye, trying to make him think I wasn’t paying attention. I turned up the volume on my STATIC X cd, listening as the 2 way paper coned speakers buzzed and echoed hollowly through the car….it made my neck hair stand on end…or did the whine of the engine do it…who cared!
I saw the green light flash out of the corner of my eye. I dropped the mighty DX into “D” and hammered it! There was a split second delay as the tranny waited to kick in…BAM! I was off! I looked up…what the? Wow! I had dusted the EVO…where was he? Wait…he’s not behind? Oh ****!
I noticed the yellow dot on the horizon up ahead. ‘Muahahahaaha’….I thought to myself, my plan had worked. I made him ‘think’ he got the jump on me! I don’t think so grasshopper. I punched it harder…the floorboard creaked from the strain of my foot planting accelerator into it. The rubber pedal bent to my will. “come on!” I screamed…the DX finally shifted into 3rd……………there! BAM! Into second. I was off!
The 1.5 liter accelerated hard! A 3 legged chihuaha pulling a 50lb cement block came instantly to mind…I was catching him fast now!
I saw him brake lights…here’s where I would take my prey. As he waited up ahead for the light to turn green, I buried my foot further into it….all 89 ponies strained, screaming for mercy! I didn’t care dammit! I would win if it killed the motor! The speedo creaped skyward….37…………………………………….38……………………………….39……it was on! By the time I got to within 500 feet of the ‘blessed’ EVO, I was nearing the civic’s peak speed……57……..58……………………5…..9……yes! I had done it! I pushed this beast past it’s known limit!
I was on the EVO fast….just as I got next to him the light turned green.
Everything went into slow mo…I tuuurrrnnneeeddd mmmyyyy hhheeeaaaddd…toward him…our cars neck and neck. I glanced down at the tach…errr…hmmm…no tach…I looked at the speedometer: 61! Holy!! I had pushed the envelope. I pointed to him, slowly, then pointed to the door of my civic…tapping the sheetmetal just below the mirror…”after I beat you” I screamed above the din “I’ll go home and clean this spot of bird **** off my car!” ahahahahaha….this race WAS mine!
I looked down again, radio. I glanced up just as we cleared the intersection. I looked over…what the? Where was he now, had I passed him sooo fast I didn’t realize? Wait! There! That yellow dot again…it was him in the distance.
But then I saw it…and my chance. The flashing light….This would end now!
I pressed the pedal even harder…..whhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…no, the DX was not crying…or maybe it was? I didn’t care, “You will take me to victory” I howled!
I blasted down the road…inching closer every second! I saw his brakes again…then that flashing light…his turn signal? I was after him…I closed, then got next to him…wow! This thing was fast! The turn signal…the brake lights…it’s a mitsu! I’m sure it was just electrical problems.
I blew past the sorry bastard, flashing the famous “L” out the pass window. He turned into Target, or as I call it “TARJAY”, French for “cheap”. He most likely was trying to get off the road, utterly embarrassed, before he wrecked his precious EVO…he was blind with rage, I’m sure.
I smiled to myself…I had fooled this wily foe. And I had won!
05-30-2005
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lol, spoken like a true ricer...j/k. Reminds me of the time that I yelled, "my car is better than yours," as I passed a chick washing her bf's 350z.
05-30-2005
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Rep Power: 0 No he shouldn't. Think about all of the writers that would lose their jobs. Do you want to explain to there kids that they can't even put rice on their table because they were out-riced?
05-30-2005
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Originally Posted by Big Rob
No he shouldn't. Think about all of the writers that would lose their jobs. Do you want to explain to there kids that they can't even put rice on their table because they were out-riced?
05-30-2005
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Rep Power: 282 Sounds like one of my kill stories. I like revving at people and getting them all hyped and ready to run at a light. The light turns green and I start to go regularly and they spin tires and cause a scene. I love it
05-30-2005
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Shinier than yours, meatbag
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Originally Posted by Kadenx
Sounds like one of my kill stories. I like revving at people and getting them all hyped and ready to run at a light. The light turns green and I start to go regularly and they spin tires and cause a scene. I love it
I'm a big fan of that trick, especially fun if you can see a cop car up ahead and they can't cause there watching the light and waiting for the green.
05-30-2005
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Originally Posted by Hurts2bStock
Hey man, you know what they say.... all is fair in Love and Rice
05-30-2005
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Originally Posted by Big Rob
lol, spoken like a true ricer...j/k. Reminds me of the time that I yelled, "my car is better than yours," as I passed a chick washing her bf's 350z.
LOL...now that's funny!
05-30-2005
#16
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Rep Power: 0 Its always fun to rev on people in my auto lol, its all riced out, then I hit the switches and start bouncing and they get jealous woot woot lol
nice story though, got me laughing like a 
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